I Will Choose You In A Heartbeat

by

You will find me in a graveyard where my feet are buried deep within the earth. You will hold my hands and pull me back up to make me whole once again.

By then, you will have already changed the beat of my heart. You will make it beat slower and faster at the same time, and these systolic changes will make me choose you.

I will choose you, and you will have no idea why.

I will choose you over the sadness, the pain and the heartbreak people in my past have caused me before you come.

I will choose you, and that is how I am going to quickly move on.

You will make me forget all the heartaches I have been feeling before I meet you. The happiness I will have with you will be too good to be true, and I won’t want to close my eyes in fear of waking up one day and realizing you are nothing but a dream.

I will choose to fall in love with you and you will have no idea why.

The kindness and generosity you will show me, all those small but amazing things you will give me — they will be a few of the many reasons why I will choose to fall for you.

Having you in my life will be something I will never expect. It’s all going to be new to me. I have never had anyone who has been willing to love me without asking anything in return. In the past, I have always been that woman who would give everything for love because that has been what people I have been with have always expected me to do.

And when our paths finally cross while I still crawl in the dark looking for the light, I won’t really know what to do. I will no longer want to be that person who used to overcompensate for the sake of love. I have always wanted to give all of me without anyone asking me to, and I have always known it is not right because it sabotages what is supposed to be an “us.”

I won’t know what to do, and so I will do what I have always been doing— I will give you everything and will expect you to return the favor.

I know that it isn’t supposed to be like that, but it is going to be hard for me to adjust. I know you are going to be different, but I will make you look like the other people I have been with. When I look at you, I will see those people’s shadows and I will start feeling the same old heartache I felt when they left.

You will to me without the intention to stay, and yet you will stay.

You will stay with me without me asking you to. And I will never imagine you to be the one who will break me back into tiny pieces, and leave me in a heartbeat.

I will choose you every day because I know that you are going to choose me, too.

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